Santa did not always use reindeer to deliver presents around the world. Early on, he tried out many different creatures that he met during his journeys. While some worked really well, in the end he realized that reindeer were really the best possible choice after some failed miserably.
This one was short lived. He hooked up a group of penguins, pulled out the reins, and cracked the whip, but the penguins just stood there. Nobody ever told Santa that penguins couldn't fly. Don't be angry: he's watching hundreds of millions of children every day. You'd miss some of this in school as well.
They worked really well for a while. The pigs were smart and, when one was too old to continue on, Santa just made breakfast the next day for him and the wife. But Santa started getting far too many letters in the mail complaining about the flying pigs saying that people were losing too many bets when they would tell their friends "…when pigs fly" and then see the flying pigs overhead. Everyone was asking Santa for money to pay off their bets, so Santa decided to stop flying the pigs.
Have you ever seen a unicorn before? No? They just couldn't take Santa's weight and now they are gone.
The polar bears would run and night fly, which was fine, but polar bears like to eat: a lot. Half the time Santa would climb out of the chimney only to find his polar bears hitting up a convenience store down the street, so he had to make a switch.
Watching monkeys fling their poo is rather entertaining, especially at 30,000 feet. However, some of it landed on the wrong guy, and the flying monkeys were deported to Oz.
Santa became very close to the phoenix, but in the end gave him away to a good friend named Albus for Christmas…
They worked well for a short while, but the smell was less than appealing, so when he lost them in a bet to the creator of Nintendo, he wasn't sad at all to see them digitized and incorporated into the "Super Mario Brothers" franchise.
These were no ordinary bees. They were massive bees the size of giant bears. Let's just say seeing a flock of suppressed bees with ten foot singers flying at your house does not bring a smile on your face; Santa found many chimneys blocked the following year.
Kangaroos seemed like a great way to gain some more favor with those down under, but their playful attitudes often made getting work done challenging. They also had to work hard to overcome the lack of flight…
Creatures that can only be seen by those who have seen death did not fair well either. Too many saw their haggard appearance and became frightened. It was too bad as they are gentle and kind beasts.
One of the most regal of all beasts, the hippogriff and Santa had a strong bond, and was willing to serve him faithfully one night a year. However, a lawsuit caused by an over zealous chimney sweep getting too close to him led to a needed change.
In the earliest of days, Santa used his reptilian flying friends. Of course that was before the ice age, a couple of meteor collisions, and the first dinosaur hunting season…
Dragons were great. They could fly incredibly fast and take him anywhere he wanted to go. Their main problem was they would burn down people's homes after Santa dropped off the gifts. Santa would just blame it on dry Christmas trees and lights, but he knew the truth and chose to go a different direction.
Let's just say that fairies have a much better union now and they refuse to fly Santa's butt around the world for just frequent flyer miles.
Not as good of a union as the fairies. Santa found that their nimble fingers and constant merriment made them better toy makers.
Sounded great in theory, but the water-proof bag Santa used sprung a leak in year six, so he had to scrap the idea in the future.