It’s never a good feeling when you’re minding your own business and the police show up. It shouldn’t come as a surprise that police officers are just as weary when receiving calls for the silliest of reasons. These people recall the moment they realized the petty reason why law enforcement was summoned for something they did.
All stories have been edited for clarity.
Flashing Cards
“Two of my coworkers from my after-school job in high school set a blanket down at a park so we could play cards together. We were on a rough side of town, but we were talking and having a good time. As we sat on the blanket and enjoyed each other’s company, we played game after game and got pleasantly caught up. We played till the sun went down, but we were sitting under a lamp so we kept playing, totally oblivious to how late it had gotten.
Suddenly, a cop showed up. Seeing his lights, we quickly realized how late it actually was. We assumed he was going to tell us the park closed at dusk and that we needed to leave. Boy were we wrong!
Apparently, a neighbor adjacent to the park called the police because they ‘saw’ the three of us ‘getting frisky’ in a public space!
The cop shook his head after he saw that we were fully clothed and merely playing cards, then laughed as he shared with us why he was summoned. Then he told us to stay as long as we’d like so long as we didn’t cause any trouble. He warned us to be careful because the neighborhood was dangerous at night.
The cop then left without further incident, chuckling to himself the entire time.”
Party Goes On
“Back in the late 80s, I hosted a lot of parties. I didn’t know my neighbor all that well, but he heard the festivities one night and wanted to join in. It was no problem, we were an inclusive group of people.
The party was fish and underwater-themed. Someone brought a three-foot-long inflatable shark. My neighbor got severely plastered and decided it would be fun to ‘surprise’ women by shoving the shark in inappropriate places. No one found his antics funny or cool. Having seen enough, I politely invited him to leave, but he refused. I invited him to leave less politely, and he still refused.
So I put the “Bunny Hop” music in, and we all bunny hopped out of the house, around the yard, making sure my neighbor was at the end of the conga line, then bunny-hopped back into the house, locking him out at the very end.
This angered my neighbor. As payback, he sulked back to his house and showed his true colors that night. He called the cops, claiming there was underage drinking which was a lie, and that we were selling illegal substances which was also a lie. The cops showed up and asked about underage drinkers so I had the youngest person at the party show his ID. As for illegal substance dealing, he told the cops that every week a girl deposited a garbage bag full of ‘questionable items’ in front of our house. He also pointed out that my roommate and I drove ‘oddly expensive cars’, which were a five-year-old Dodge Colt and a 78 Corolla.
My explanation to the cops was that the ‘peculiar garbage bag’, was actually garbage, which my roommate’s girlfriend would put on the street in front of our house the night before garbage day so she didn’t have to pay for trash pick up. I didn’t have to explain the cars that we worked hard for.
The cops went over to talk to my neighbor, told him to leave us alone, and took off. Apparently, he kept calling them because they came back and took him away in handcuffs.
My landlord owned both of our houses and evicted the guy a month later. He wasn’t paying for heating oil and was trying to heat the entire house with numerous space heaters. It was an old house and he kept burning out the wires in the walls by overloading them with all the space heaters. A total of only two outlets worked by the time he got evicted.”
Gas Station Temper Tantrum
“I used to work for a gas station.
This lady wanted to fill up her car and given she was driving a Ford Fusion, I suggested she go with thirty dollars to fill up when she asked. She paid with her VISA card and went out to the pump.
However, the lady’s tank didn’t take it all. She came back in to ask for the remaining change back. I told her that the remaining amount was credited back to the card. I was not at liberty to pay her in cash.
Out of nowhere, the woman snapped.
She started making a scene and knocked over a rack full of chips to the ground in a rage before uttering a single word in disagreement with what I said.
My manager witnessed all of it and demanded that she pull herself together, and get out of the store before we called the cops.
And guess what?
Susan then took out her phone and dialed 911. As her ’emergency’, I heard her mention the cashier.
Yeah, that was me.
On the phone, she claimed that she was being harassed and I stole money from her.
Harassed!
The lady knew that she was full of you-know-what and drove away before the cops arrived. My manager pulled up the recording and showed it to the cops along with the lady’s license plate.
I hope she’s doing fine.”
Drop The Sandwich!
“I hated eating lunch with people at work because I hated my co-workers. So, I used to hop in my car, go down an access road that was parallel to a highway, park off the shoulder, and eat my lunch while listening to the radio or my tapes for a half hour. The roads are separated by a fence and thirty yards of grass on the other side.
One day, a State Trooper with his lights flashing came screaming off the highway. He parked his car on the grass next to the fence, exited his vehicle, pulled his weapon, and immediately started shouting at me.
‘Freeze, stay in the car! Hands where I can see them!’
I was still eating my sandwich. After removing it from my mouth, I slowly placed it on the passenger seat and laid my hands on the dashboard.
Thirty seconds later, two more Troopers, and a Deputy Sheriff, came racing down the access road toward me with their lights and sirens flashing. I couldn’t control my trembling as I tried to figure out what the heck was going on.
Each of them exited their vehicle. I was surrounded by a total of three cops with their weapons drawn. One ordered me out of the vehicle, on my knees, then instructed me to put my hands behind my head. I was handcuffed while they started searching the car. They took the keys out of the ignition and search the trunk. No one told me what was happening.
They found nothing in my trunk, so began to they search the surrounding grassy areas and across the access road.
Finally, one of the cops asked, ‘What are you doing here?’
‘Eating lunch,’ I told them. ‘Why? Am I not supposed to park here?!’
They helped me up, one on each side, and uncuffed me.
Then they told me the reason why I was swarmed. To say I was confused would be an understatement.
Apparently, someone reported a green car sitting by the side of the road pointing a dangerous weapon at traffic on the highway.
I had no idea how a sandwich looked like a weapon. It wasn’t even a sub, just two pieces of pumpernickel. My sandwich had a stack of corned beef, lettuce, and Russian dressing in between.
They let me go.”
All Dry
“I watered my flowers.
It was the early 90s. I planted flowers in my front yard a couple of months before and they were doing well. I also had veggies that were thriving that were planted in a separate section in my front yard.
There was a drought in my area. Eventually, a mandate to conserve water was put into effect. This was something I was already being mindful of. We were permitted to water food-producing plants, but not decorative plants. It was completely understandable. However, I came up with an idea.
When I was downstairs doing laundry one day, I noticed the water from my central air conditioner draining into the stationary tubs. This was water that I couldn’t use for cooking, but I had the revelation that I could use it for watering both my veggies and my flowers! So I started using it respectively.
I put a bucket in the stationary tub where the water was draining and every now and then I would take the bucket outside and water whatever needed watering.
My next-door neighbor was immediately hot on my tail. He stomped over and told me he would call the police the next time he saw me watering my flowers.
I explained to him that I wasn’t using water from the tap. Not that it was any of his business, but I found myself explaining how I was using the water draining out my A/C unit from the humidity in the air.
My neighbor didn’t buy my explanation. A couple of days later, all I could do was watch as a police officer pulled up in my driveway. The police officer informed me about the complaint that ‘someone’ made about me not following the water mandate.
Calmy, I brought the cop down to the basement and into the laundry room. I showed him the bucket and explained what I was doing.
He thought it was a ‘brilliant idea’ and said he and his wife would start doing it, too. I assumed he told my neighbor not to bother calling again about the issue because I never had the police show up about it again.”
Look Into The Light
“I lived in a two-family home, on the second floor. There was a house next door that had a laundry room in the attic on the side of the house that faced my house. The day my neighbors moved in, they must have gone into the laundry room, turned on the light which was a bare bulb in a ceiling fixture, and ‘forgot’ to turn it off.
Unfortunately, the light was extremely bright! It was so bright, it lit up my entire kitchen, even when my shades were down. If someone looked at my house from the outside, they could see the entire side of my house lit up from that one lightbulb! It even shined bright in the downstairs apartment!
The neighbors had no shade or blinds on the window I’m light sensitive, so I hardly turn on lights unless needed and most of my lights are not very bright. Them leaving the light on non-stop was an assault on my eyes!
I thought that the light was forgotten and that the next time they were up there, it would be turned off. I was wrong. That light remained lit for months! Then, one night, I noticed the light was off.
Finally, I thought. Relief!
Well, it only lasted two days. After the second day, the light was back up and running. I assumed it burned out and was replaced. The day after the light came back, I was going out of town, so I thought that surely when I got back, the light would be off.
I was wrong again!
Their light was relentless! One day, I saw the male tenant of the apartment coming home and I asked him to please turn off his attic light.
‘I don’t know what you’re talking about,’ he grumbled.
I was a bit annoyed with his gruff response, so I asked him which words he didn’t understand: ‘light’ or ‘attic’. Without another word, he turned to go to his house. I followed him until he got between the houses and asked him to please turn around and look at my house. He obliged. I then explained that it was HIS light that was lighting up the entire side of my house.
‘Can you please turn it off?’ I tried again. An hour later, the light went off.
Unfortunately, it only lasted a day. Soon after, the light was back. I managed to run into him weeks later and asked him again to turn off the light or get a shade for the window. He totally ignored me.
A few years passed with no changes and I had enough. I had a rather large flashlight, so I devised a plan to get back at my neighbor. It took no time to place it in my kitchen window, facing his kitchen window. I wanted to see how long it would take for them to get annoyed and figure out that I was being petty because of their light.
Less than one hour after I shined the light, there was a knock at my door.
It was the police!
Two officers greeted me before one of them asked if I knew why they were there.
I said, ‘I honestly don’t know, sir. I haven’t done anything wrong and I’m just trying to be a good neighbor by helping the people next door light up their kitchen like they’re ‘helping’ light up mine.’
Both cops erupted in laughter! One said to the other, ‘I told you that’s why she has a light shining on them!’ As they were walking from next door to my house, they noticed the spotlight on my house that was coming from my neighbor’s window.
They asked how the issue could be resolved. I told them I had asked my neighbor quite a few times to turn off the light or get a shade so it didn’t shine directly into my home. The police then asked me if the light was turned off, or if the window was covered, would I turn off my light. I told them that since they didn’t know how to keep their light off if they covered the window, I would immediately turn my light off. The cops went back to my neighbor’s house to discuss my request with the neighbors.
A few minutes later, the cops came out and told me that the neighbors agreed to cover the window. As we watched, the guy got a big piece of cardboard and covered the window.
I apologized to the officers for getting a call for something so trivial. I only wanted to see how long it would take my neighbors to get annoyed enough to figure out what I was doing and shut off the light. Never in a million years did I think they would get the police involved.
They had a little laugh over the situation. My neighbor told the cops that they had no idea that their light was bothering me! I told them that I asked them several times to cover it or shut it off.
Instead of buying a five-dollar shade, those knuckleheads kept that ugly cardboard covering the window until they moved out.”
It’s Our Fence
“I was moving into a house I had just bought. It was my very first day of homeownership. I had friends helping me move and unpack my things.
I had some sheets of plywood I planned on using to make some repairs. At around, mid-day during our second load we brought the plywood. I leaned it on the fence between my house and one of my neighbors’ as we unloaded the truck.
I stayed behind to unpack a few things while my friends took the truck and went back for another load to drop off. While I was in the zone and keeping a good pace with the carrying-in process the police showed up. They went next door and then came to my house.
Apparently, my neighbor called and complained about the plywood I left leaning on the fence. I asked, ‘Since I just bought this house…doesn’t that make it ‘our’ fence?’
The cops looked at each other then back to me and said, ‘Yep.’
I told them to tell the neighbors to get lost. The cops laughed and said, ‘Have a good day!’
I never had a pleasant word with my neighbor after that stunt they pulled. I made a point to lean stuff against that fence often.”
So How About Those Digits?
“One time I was in a mall and came across a very attractive woman. As a single young man, I was thinking, ‘Yeah, talk to her, get her phone number. You’ll never see here again if you don’t.’
Needless to say, I approached her. We had a ten-minute conversation. Toward the end, she gave me her number. I was ecstatic. I practically skipped out of the mall and pranced to my car when suddenly blue and red lights began to swarm me.
The cops jumped out and started asking me a bunch of questions. I told them I had a harmless conversation with a woman and wasn’t sure why the cops had been called on me.
After I explained myself, the cops chuckled. One even congratulated me. Apparently, the young security guard at the mall called the cops on me and reported that I was some kind of stalker.
This was ten years ago. I’m still appalled by it. If there was a problem, why didn’t the security guard just confront me? What was the point of getting the cops involved?
If the security wanted me to leave all he had to do was say so. I would have left.
The whole thing was blown way out of proportion. The good news is that the cops realized what was going on and just laughed about the whole thing. I got to meet the girl later for coffee too.
It was well worth it in the end.”
Dead Sleep
“I have sleeping problems, so I often need a nap in the middle of the day. Whatever job I worked, I tried to find a way to take a nap at lunchtime. Sometimes it was the only way I could stay awake the rest of the day.
When I worked for a mail-order company that had a quiet, carpeted inventory room, I would make a little nest on the floor in a corner.
When I had my own office, I would close the door and prop my feet up on my desk.
One company had a designated nursing room for women, but since I worked the night shift and we had no nursing mothers, I could take a midnight nap.
I even carried a small alarm clock in my bag at all times to make sure I never overslept.
Evidently, there were times when I couldn’t find a place to nap, so I would retreat to my car and stretch out in the back. I was able to make a nice little nest by covering all the windows, or by making a tent with a blanket. If it was hot, I’d leave a door open to let the breeze blow through.
So, at one of my jobs, I stretched out in the backseat of my car. Our building and parking area were at the end of a leafy little cul-du-sac. I always tried to park facing away from the building so I could have a little privacy since my feet would poke out and be visible with my door open.
On this particular day, I had to park facing the building, so my open door was visible from the cul-de-sac.
I was sleeping peacefully when suddenly a police car rolled up next to me. I woke up immediately when two cops came over and bent down to peer inside the backseat. They saw me and I saw them. My heart stopped. Thoughts raced through my head.
What’s going on? Why are the cops here? Did I do something? Am I breaking some kind of law?
No.
Apparently, someone had reported a body in a car. The caller had been driving by and spotted bare feet sticking of out of the back of a car, became concerned, and called the police.
Apparently, I have the feet of a dead person.
Yay.”
Waste of Time and Space
“I used to work for the security team at a factory that manufactured car frames. There was a small space directly next to the guards’ shack reserved for motorcycle parking. One day, one of the plant employees parked his car in that area.
We told him that he would have to move his car because it wasn’t a motorcycle. There was actually an open parking spot directly behind where he parked, so he would have only had to have backed up the length of his car.
The plant worker, however, refused and stated he could park there because he had a handicapped parking permit. I informed him it may have been the case, but it didn’t entitle him to park wherever he pleased. His pass only permitted him to park in spots reserved for the handicapped.
I told him that he had to move his car, or I would have to write him a parking ticket. The plant worker ignored my warning and proceeded to walk into the building to start his shift.
So, I wrote the parking ticket up and placed it on his windshield.
A little while later, a police cruiser pulled in and an officer came in to inform me that the same employee had called the police to complain. I briefly explained the situation to the officer. The cop didn’t hide his frown while observing the way the improperly parked car. He also saw the sign indicating it was motorcycle parking. Most importantly, he noted the absence of a handicapped parking sign.
The officer said, ‘That’s not a handicapped parking spot.’ Then he turned to me and asked, ‘Do you want me to have it towed?’
I was very, very tempted. However, there was a rigid policy regarding parking offenses. The plant employees were given a certain number of warnings that evolved into tickets, and then they faced having their vehicles towed. The worker hadn’t reached the point where the policy would require towing, and if we towed him against this policy, his union would have been all over us.
However, the employee still had to pay the parking ticket and he got a very stern talking to from the officer about wasting the police’s time.’
