Ever been wronged by someone, and longed for a chance to put them in their place? Sometimes, the perfect opportunity arises for some sweet, sweet revenge. That's something these people know too well.
People on Reddit and Quora share the sweetest revenge they've ever taken. Content has been edited for clarity.
Hope The Toast Was Good
“Years ago, I found out from my kids their father, my ex-husband, was applying to get out of the police department with a physical injury discharge. That meant, if approved, he could get 3/4 of his salary tax-free for the rest of his life.
I was boiling mad because he laughed and told the kids it was a fake injury claimed years before. I knew I had no credibility with the police department since I divorced one of their own.
The teacher I was working for at the time saw I was depressed about something, so I told him my story.
‘Where does your husband work?’ he asked me.
I told him the number precinct in Brooklyn.
‘My cousin is the Borough Chief,’ my teacher said. ‘I’ll call him up for you.’
I told my teacher to tell the chief that my ex-husband was trying to get out on a fake injury. If he couldn’t believe that, then go through his Civilian Complaints records-they were stuffed with complaints against my ex-husband.
My teacher called his cousin and his cousin knew the name – his file was on his desk at that moment while he made a decision. The chief admitted to the teacher he didn’t feel comfortable letting him retire on the injury, but my ex-husband’s captain cleaned up his records and was begging to let my ex-husband go (the captain couldn’t stand my ex-husband – his nickname there was Psycho Cop).
My teacher told his cousin he knew that the injuries he claimed were fake, and to check his files over at Civilian Complaints. The chief immediately had someone watch my ex-husband and sure enough, he got him on video and pictures at the gym, lifting weights, running on the treadmill – everything he said he couldn’t do.
Then he saw the huge file on him. The chief not only denied his medical discharge, but he also wrote on his application, ‘must serve full 20 years. Do not refile.’
My ex-husband was dumbfounded. His captain showed him the pictures and videos the chief had gotten, showing his physical ability. My ex-husband spent the last years of his career in a room behind a desk, doing some paperwork. He never knew it was me and the chief’s cousin. And one week after his 20th anniversary, the captain gave him a choice – retire or get fired. My ex-husband, who hoped to work another five years and add to his pension, retired that day. Most retirees get dinner and the fellow officers chip in $20 a piece so the retiree can go on vacation. My ex-husband got breakfast – one guy from the precinct took him out for toast and coffee and said bye.
I wouldn’t have denied my ex-husband his discharge if he truly earned it. But I knew from our 16-year marriage, that was his dream score. He told me just about every day how he was going to get one over on everyone. He was the one who got it in the end.”
She Easily Could Have Moved
“Had someone park in my assigned covered space at midnight on a Saturday. This has happened more than once.
One time, I called the management to have them towed. Management tells me they don’t tow anymore because the management would have to pay because it was private property, so, ‘tough luck.’
I parked behind them and blocked them in. There was a block wall in front. I left the neighbors each a note on their door, letting them know if they needed to leave, knock on my door.
At 10 am, there was a frantic pounding on my door, me in pajamas, some girl hysterical because she had to go to work and was going to lose her job. I asked her if she knew it was reserved parking, she said yes, it was midnight and there were no other parking spaces and she didn’t want to street park and walk because it wasn’t safe. I asked her why she was okay with making me park on the street and walk after midnight?
She told me she was going to have me towed. I laughed and went back to bed.
Management then called to tell me I was blocking someone in, and if I don’t move, they will have me towed. I related the conversation from the middle of the night, the ‘tough luck’ part. I then told them if they tow me instead of the violator in my spot, I was going to sue them for failing to enforce the rules, endangering my safety because the reason I parked that way was because it was after midnight, and ‘everyone knows it is not safe to park on the street and walk.’
I offered to wait for the tow truck then move so they could tow the ‘parking violator.’
Management then told the girl, ‘tough luck.’
She was back pounding on my door and screaming. People were now calling management about a lunatic ‘trying to break into someone’s apartment.’
The guy she banged the night before showed up to my door. The girl was at the bottom of the stairs crying so hard she had hiccups. Guy apologized profusely, said he didn’t know she parked in my spot and the management was threatening to evict him. He had other run-ins. He apologized again and offered me money for my trouble.
I told him that wasn’t necessary, I was just waiting for the girl to apologize. He nodded, went downstairs, yelled at her, and pointed up to me. She came upstairs and apologized and I moved my car.”
He Knew Right Away
“I had found out that my wife of four years was cheating on me. She had locked her phone, stayed out at all hours, and was acting strange. We were in the phase of trying to work it out. Well actually, I had threatened to leave her, so she decided to at least pretend to end things with the nut bag she was sleeping with.
One day, early in the morning, I was at work and got a text from her. She never texted me at this hour, so that was weird. She was saying how she thought it might be better if she were to cut the marriage off and just be with her new boo.
She kept putting ‘LOL’ after her sentences, which she never does with me. So, on a hunch, I just began to say, well, maybe we should break it off. But I pointed out how we would never be together again, never have sleep together again, never share all the experiences we had, ever again.
I texted, ‘Remember the time when you apologized to me and said that you wouldn’t go back to him ever again?’
That made the texts stop. Later, my wife called me and said, ‘We need to talk.’
I said, ‘About what?’
She said, ‘The things you texted.’ I feigned ignorance.
She said I said a lot in that text, and it wasn’t even true. I said, ‘So?’ She couldn’t say any more, but I know that it wasn’t her texting. Her boo was texting me early in the morning from her phone, trying to show me she was his now. And I had dropped the mother lode.
But if she let me know it wasn’t her that received the texts, then she would have to explain why someone other than her was texting me from her phone so early in the morning. And she denied everything.
But according to the texts, I knew all about who she was with and had revealed some (totally fabricated), but embarrassing details that made him really mad.
Because of those fateful texts, they broke up. Apparently, she was too much, even for a no-good scumbag like him.
Revenge is so sweet.
I divorced her and haven’t looked back. That was seven years ago. I still laugh at those texts because the dude she was cheating on me with, was particularly mean-spirited. Served him right.”
“Easiest $200 I Ever Made”
“An uncle of mine was a serious addict and an all-around bully. When I was a kid, it was pretty common for him to steal from my grandparents, including a lot of things they intended to give me when I was older (a coin collection, things like that). There’s a long list of things he did over the course of my life to make me made, but I’ll skip to the petty revenge.
I was browsing the local county website and noticed there was a section for active warrants. I wondered if any familiar names were listed, so I browsed it and to my complete lack of surprise, I saw my uncle’s name listed for something minor. Then I saw the Crime Stoppers number at the top of the page. I knew where he was living at the time and it was anonymous, so what the heck? I called, described him, and told them where he was. They gave me a reference number and told me to call back in two weeks.
For the sake of being thorough, I called a relative from the other side of the family who, funny enough, was not only a cop but also in charge of following up on these things. I told him the situation and he said he’d prioritize it.
Two weeks later, I called Crime Stoppers for an update and they said the tip did indeed lead to an arrest and asked which post office I preferred. I was confused, but I named one. They gave me an alias, told me to give that name to the clerk and there would be a general delivery envelope with $200 cash inside. That part was unexpected, but a sweet bonus for sure.
Easiest $200 I ever made.”
She Had That Coming
“There was a really beautiful, popular girl my friend, (I’ll call him ‘Mike,’) had a serious crush on. He asked her out several times but she was always ‘busy.’ She never really discouraged him though, I think she liked the attention.
One day Mike got a hold of two tickets to a sold-out U2 concert. He bought them from a friend who had to go out of town for an emergency. Mike immediately called the girl of his dreams and of course, she accepted. He was thrilled and everything seemed fine.
The night of the concert, they’re at the arena waiting for the show to begin and she suddenly says, ‘Oh, I see my friend, I’ll be right back!’
You guessed it, she never returned. Mike stayed at the seats since that’s the only place she would logically look for him. When the show ended, Mike ever the gentleman, waited for a long time so he could drive her home. But saw no sign of her. She didn’t answer her phone or texts. So he left feeling so hurt.
By the next morning, he was rightfully mad! She called him around noon apologizing and saying she ran into her ex-boyfriend. Apparently, they had a long talk and worked out a lot of stuff and lost track of time. She had actually missed the concert and blah, blah, blah.
He accepted her apology and asked if they could try again. She accepted and told him how very nice and forgiving he was. She had underestimated him!
So the next Saturday evening he took her to a very expensive seafood restaurant about an hour up the coast. He was polite and chatty the whole way up there. He made the reservation in her name.
They were seated, ordered a nice bottle of bubbles, some expensive appetizers, and entrées, then Mike excused himself to go to the men’s room. He very deliberately said, ‘I’ll be right back.’
He walked out to the parking lot and drove away. And became the hero of every good guy who’s been treated like trash by a girl because she just didn’t give a darn about his feelings.”
“The Look On His Face Was Priceless”
“When I rented, the parking lot was assigned parking. My wife and I both had cars, so I had to pay extra for the extra spot. The first one was complimentary.
We came home one night around one am and some idiot was parked in my spot. Not having it, and not wanted to deal with an overnight parking ban on the street, I parked behind him perpendicularly to block him in my spot. My neighboring spot was my caretaker, who was the most chill guy I’ve ever rented from. I sent him a text explaining and to call me if he needed out before me in the morning. He laughed and said all was good.
After about an hour of watching TV I went out for a smoke. I noticed this guy’s car was running. I watched him frantically at two am looking around for whose car it is. He saw me and starts complaining about it, not knowing it was mine. The guy said just wanted to go home and didn’t understand why some people gotta be such bullies. I told him maybe the owner of the car was mad because you were in his spot. Then, I told him some people pay extra monthly for another spot. He gave up and went back into his buddy’s unit. After I saw him go inside, I decided to inside and go to bed.
The morning to go out for a bit, guy was sitting on his buddy’s doorstep. I waved and got in my car and leave. Made that guy sit trapped all night till nine am. The look on his face as I entered my car was priceless.”
“I Was Tired, Hungry, And Now Furious”
“My landlady’s insane daughter is a bit insane. This girl literally throws fits of screaming and crying at all hours of the day and night, slams doors constantly for no reason, and refuses to speak at a volume quieter than a yell.
She also never wears headphones when listening to anything. Our rooms are on opposite ends of the house so when she’s in her room I don’t care. However, my room is unfortunately right off of the dining room, and she likes to set up shop at the dining room table, blasting music or whatever trash show she’s binging. If she were a reasonable person, I would just ask nicely for her to turn the volume down. But since she isn’t a reasonable person, and such requests are often met with intentional stomping around at three a.m. when she knows I have to be up at five a.m. for work, I have to get creative with making her shut the heck up sometimes.
Last night I got home from a nine-hour shift at work, exhausted, and retreated to my room to have a snack and get some sleep.
I wasn’t in my room ten minutes before the demon set up shop at the dining room table. I don’t know what show she was watching, but all I could hear was mumbled dialogue and then the world’s most annoying laugh track after what seemed like every other sentence. It was 11 at night. I was tired, hungry, and now furious.
So I booted up my laptop, went into my Netflix queue, and picked one of my favorite episodes of ‘Call the Midwife.’ I cranked my volume up, and not long after the opening credits came the screams of a woman giving birth. I left the episode running while I had my snack and got ready for bed, and wouldn’t you know by the time I was ready to sleep and turned the show-off I was met with complete silence from the dining room.”
Beau Learned An Important Lesson
“At college, I shared a three-bedroom house with two other people, who over time were not always the same two. One housemate was a female (I’m a guy) who I’ll call ‘Beau.’ She was a spoiled little rich girl but seemed pretty nice most of the time. We had two refrigerators in the kitchen, one large one originally in the house and we all had shared, and a small older one a friend gave me before he moved away, which became exclusively for my use while my space in the larger fridge then became available to the other housemates. Win-win.
Even though the house was in a nice neighborhood just across the street from the backside of the University President’s mansion, it was pretty woodsy and we did occasionally have a rat problem with them getting into the house, which I solved with rat traps. The regular kind that looked like large mousetraps. One time, I caught two rats simultaneously in one trap, which seemed so unusual. So, I wanted to show them to my other two housemates, but Beau was so horrified and disgusted she refused to even look at them. She then ran from the room to be away from two dead rats hanging from the trap I was holding out. I didn’t enjoy killing the rats, but there was no other effective way of dealing with them so I did what I had to do. Beau was just a squeamish little drama queen who felt she had to make a big show about how disgusted she was by the thought of being anywhere near a dead rat.
Fast-forward a few weeks or months, I don’t remember exactly, and I eventually became aware Beau was stealing my food! We didn’t normally share food in the house, but each bought and made our own. If she had asked nicely I’d have readily shared with her or if she was obviously starving I’d have offered, but like I said she was a spoiled little rich girl with plenty of money to get her own food (which she did), and she never once asked for any of mine. One time I remember I had just made a plate of steamed fresh vegetables with melted cheese and soy sauce on it (yum). Out of the corner of my eye, I watched Beau stab a nice cheesy Brussel’s Sprout off my plate with a fork and pop it into her mouth. She didn’t realize I had seen her do that, but for the next few minutes I gained some delightful schadenfreude at her expense by talking to her while looking right at her, and she had a very difficult time trying to reply meaningfully with a whole Brussels sprout still in her mouth. I knew what she’d done and it was kind of trivial so I didn’t blow up about it or anything like that. However, the incident alerted me to how stealing my food was kind of a game to Beau, like she thought I was stupid compared to her cleverness and I would never figure her out. She kinda had that kind of personality, and even though she had plenty of her own food, I guess she enjoyed getting into mine. I used to buy some pretty nice cheeses, maybe that was a big draw for her.
So I started paying closer attention to my food and marking bottles and things like that once I caught on Beau was the kind of person who’d steal from her housemates. Soon enough, I began to notice telltale signs she had gone through my fridge while I wasn’t home, taking little nibbles and shavings from anything she could. The cheese especially was obvious; she’d cut pieces off because she’d do it in sloppy ways that I never would. I thought about putting a padlock on my refrigerator but felt that was not something I should ever have to do, and I didn’t want to raise the issue to a level of confrontation with Beau, preferring to remain on otherwise good terms with her. If I’m going to wreck a relationship with someone I share a house with, it has to be for a lot more important reason.
Then one day we got some more rats in the house, and I caught one in a rat trap when I was the only person home. Suddenly an inspiration came to me, and I wrapped the dead rat in the smallest piece of aluminum foil that would just barely cover him up in one layer, with only maybe 1/8? of overlapping seam at the most. Then I placed that assembly into a small plastic Baggie with a rubber band around it, with a single hair under the rubber band so I could easily tell if my little dead rat package had been opened. I didn’t even need the hair to tell me the package had been opened. It was only the second day after I had left it on the bottom shelf of my refrigerator I came home from school and saw the aluminum foil was all crinkled. I only wish I could have been a fly on the wall, watching Beau gagging in revulsion and suppressing the urge to barf as she rewrapped the package.
For a while afterward, I would put a secret detective hair under the gasket of my refrigerator before going to school in the morning, but it was never disturbed, and my cheese never got chopped on in funny ways again either, so I knew Beau learned her lesson and stayed out of my refrigerator. She never said anything about the incident and neither did I, but she found another place to live within a couple of months.
It was nice to see her go.”
He Gave Her One Last Look
“I am a frequent flyer, but at this time in my career, I wasn’t getting frequent upgrades to business class. I prefer the aisle seats and was settling in for a long flight across the country when a very annoyed woman informed me that I was sitting in her aisle seat.
I was embarrassed after taking a look at my boarding pass and seeing I actually had been assigned a middle seat. Middle seats are the worst seats on the plane. You play elbow jockey with not one but two people in your row, and you still have to ask permission from the person in the aisle to use the restroom. It’s a crummy way to take a long flight.
I apologized and took my proper seat. As she sat down, she said something to me like ‘I bet you wish you were in the aisle seat.’
I replied sheepishly that I probably did. She went on to say that she was a frequent flyer and only sits in aisle seats. I mumbled something in semi-polite response, but it was clear she was gloating.
All of a sudden, in what seemed like perfect timing that only happens in a movie, a gate agent magically appeared in our row looking for me. She asked me if I would be interested in an upgrade to business class. With a look of unbridled joy on my face, I responded, ‘Why yes, thank you, I would love an upgrade to business class.’
I gathered my gear, pulled my carry on luggage from the bin, and headed up to the front of the plane. Before I left, I made sure to look back and wink at the woman in the aisle seat.”
“Never Been So Proud Of Myself”
“There’s a new truck in my apartment’s parking lot. Always taking up multiple spots, ALWAYS. Weird angles, close to the stairs, all over the place (no assigned parking unfortunately). Months of this.
I drive a much smaller car than that, and I’m petty/passive-aggressive, I’ve been waiting for my chance. A few days ago was my shot.
I got home quite late and there were zero spots open in my lot. Big truck is double-parked again, but there’s just enough room on their driver side for me to sneak in there with my little clown car. I carefully pull in, making sure not to touch anything, no damage, no nothing. My passenger side mirror is half an inch from their driver side door. I giggled to myself all the way back to my apartment and set an alarm and waited. The following morning I wake up before the alarm to loud door slamming and stomping around. I check out my window and I see the double-parking culprit walking around both vehicles, taking pictures, texting someone, taking more pictures, I’m shaking with glee. They then swallow their pride, let out a visual sigh, and climb in the passenger side, clamber over the center console, and Austin Powers 20 point turn their butts out of the spot.
I’ve never been so proud of myself and my petty, passive-aggressive ways.”
