Unfortunately, the average person doesn't get to pick our neighbors. On some occasions, they end up having great neighbors that become more like friends. On other occasions, they have neighbors that think the world revolves around them and use that justification to terrorize everyone in the vicinity of their home.

Let's take a look at some stories of neighbors that have lost their marbles.

All posts have been edited for clarity.

The Crazy Lady
The Crazy Lady

"She called the cops and township for anything, real or imagined, that she felt needed to stop.

She complained a woman down the street was illegally running a business in a residential zone.

The woman in question was a foster parent and the crazy lady said, 'She's getting paid by the government to take these kids! That's a business!'

The family across the street from her had a special needs child and a nurse came by a few times a week for reasons I'm not privy to. The nurse parked legally on the street. The crazy lady called to cops to ticket and tow the nurse's car for parking in front of her house.

She said, 'Those spots belong to my property.'

I tended to a bulb garden at the end of my property that a previous tenant had planted. I would put kitchen scraps, plant material only, in a small composting pile next to it. The crazy lady called the cops and said that I was leaving garbage through the yard and onto her property. The cops came by, saw about ten potatoes-worth of skins and a few banana peels in a neat pile surrounded by bricks.

They told me to have a good day.

The crazy lady continued to insist the property line was where she wanted it to be, which right through the aforementioned bulb garden. She went out and bought a bunch of shrubs and just dug up our yard and tried planting a new hedgerow on her imagined property line. My landlord ripped them out that afternoon, the crazy lady called the cops. The landlord offered to hire a surveyor, and did, and the cops told her to not plant anything until it was resolved.

The landlord and surveyors show up. The crazy lady ripped the rebar from the surveyor's hands, insisted that was all a plot to steal her property, and chased them off. Cops were called in to supervise and guard the surveying team. She behaved until they left. She then went and dug up our yard to replant the shrubs again.

The crazy lady then sprayed roundup through the bulb garden I was tending because it was on her property in her eyes. After that, she put web cameras in each of her windows pointed at my house.

She accused me of dealing illicit substances and claimed that I had cars pulling in at all hours of the day and night, none of which is true. Of course, she called the cops.

The crazy lady owned two Cadillacs, an impala, and a pickup truck. She would park them on the street, spaced just far enough, to block anyone from being able to park on the block because those spaces were part of her property in her eyes. They were not. This was despite the fact that she had a private driveway she could have used.

She accused my other neighbor of sleeping with her husband for money. She tried calling the cops for that as well.

She was charged with harassing my other neighbor twice, appeared in court twice, and was found guilty twice. The crazy lady continued to insist that there was a conspiracy against her to steal her property."

Yard Care

Text Source 1, 2, 3, 4

Yard Care

1."I used to live in a neighborhood with a Homeowners Association. One of the members on the board lived across the street from my neighbor and me.

He sent a letter to us saying that we all have to mow the lawn on the same day, at the same cut height, and in the same pattern to create uniformity in the neighborhood.

My neighbor and I intentionally cut on different days and in opposite patterns just to annoy the guy."

2. "At my last place, I had a neighbor that would re-mow my lawn if my lines weren't straight enough or if I missed a spot. I never found out who it was, but that was an incredibly fun summer.

It only happened that year too."

3. "We bought a house and on the day while we were unloading the first truckload, the neighbor came into our garage uninvited and started telling us what trees on our property he wanted us to cut down.

He wasn't the craziest, but the audacity of some people is baffling."

4. "He took it upon himself to mow my lawn while I was at work. My mower broke and I couldn't get it fixed because I needed to wait until the next payday.

He ran over a rock in my yard, damaged his mower, and asked that I pay to replace the blades.

I didn't even ask him to mow my lawn."

Irresponsible Neighbor
Irresponsible Neighbor

"The neighbor behind us had a leak in his water pipe and, rather than fix it, he just had the sump pump drain it out into the back yard. This meant that all year round the back of our yard was a little bit damp.

Eventually, the leaky pipe burst and filled the house with five feet of water. His solution to that was just to keep the pump running and flood the entire neighborhood. After about an hour, a posse of all the neighbors whose yards were being flooded confronted him and called the city to shut off the water.

The city fixed the water pipe and the neighbor ended up with a large fine. At least my yard stays basically dry now.

I should also mention that this neighbor once rented the house out to a bunch of drugees and it nearly burned down because the ex-girlfriend of one of those morons snuck in and set the house on fire."

"I'm going to call it in"

Text Source 1, 2, 3, 4

"I'm going to call it in"

1. "She pulled us over pretending to be a police officer and said that we had somehow broken the law whilst pulling out of our driveway.

She also said, 'I'm going to call it in.'

She wasn’t a cop.

I considered using my dashcam video to actually call it in, but we had just moved in and I wasn’t sure if she was the type of crazy to burn the house down or poison my dog.

After chatting with the other neighbors, it turned out she was just the wannabe Homeowners Association president in a neighborhood with no Homeowners Association. So, mostly harmless. Just very annoying."

2. "I had this crazy woman in my old neighborhood who used to pretend she was a cop all the time. I first encountered her screaming at the post office staff because she had arrived past the pickup time and they couldn’t guarantee her letter would be in the next day. She was there almost an hour just pitching a fit while they opened the other counters around her.

She shouted, 'Do you know who I am?!' And all that stuff.

The second time I encountered her she had cornered some poor child on the bus and was telling her she would have her arrested because she was a police officer and she didn’t like the way the kid was eating a bag of crisps or whatever. Real invective stuff. I stepped in and politely asked if the child knew that wackjob, at which point she backed off.

Anyway, I guess she saw me leave at my stop because I woke up the next morning to find my garden torn up. She was a total weirdo."

3. "Once, I took my kids to the park and a guy called the police because, in his opinion, they were running around unsupervised all over the park. He called the cops after he approached my husband and me to keep a better watch over our son. So he did that knowing his parents were there and watching.

The park was enclosed, we had multiple parent-friends also there with their kids, everyone was watching everyone's kids. Our four-year-old son never got further than a hundred feet from us at the most. He was playing with my eight-year-old daughter and her best friend.

The guy called 911 in front of us after arguing with my husband. The 911 operator thought it was a lone kid running around on the street at first until she heard he was at a park, then the idiot trying to report it mentioned that his parents were there.

The operator said, 'Yeah, this isn't an emergency, we're not sending police out. You could call CPS, I guess, but they may also not want to file a report.'"

4. "My sister’s neighbor reported my sister to the police because her kids were playing in my sister’s garden. Not for the usual reasons like too much noise.

Nope, because a volcano in Italy had erupted, and the radiation would hurt them.

My sister lives in the United Kingdom."

The Trees
The Trees

"My parents had a crazy next-door neighbor. It started with the 'No trespassing; sign in her backyard that faced our yard and nothing else. She set up a motion-activated floodlight that faces the side of our house and nothing else. She stabbed our ball when it landed in her yard when we were children. She called the cops on the neighbors because their dog barked constantly despite them not owning a dog. She thinks my mother, the sweetest person you can meet in this world, is a backstabbing traitor for warning the new neighbors not to let their kids play on her lawn. She verbally assaulted me for chasing deer out of our flower garden. But the true psycho moment came with the trees.

We have large trees along the property line that are just barely on our side. She was starting to go all psycho about how the tree was going to fall and crush her house and demanded it be cut down.

We consulted an arborist who said it did not but could use a trim that would make it impossible to fall on her yard at all. The entire time they were trimming she stalked the property line and screamed if anyone stepped over it. While this trim was happening a single stick fell on her lawn. She lost it.

She threatened to call the cops and told them they better have all their licenses up to date. The arborists tried to blow her off but my mom insisted they check. They sent someone to City Hall and renewed their license.

Thirty minutes after that, a cop showed up to check as the crazy neighbor had called them. The arborists were super thankful for my mom warning them."

Parking

Text Source 1, 2, 3

Parking

1. "I cared for an elderly woman for many years. She lived to the age of ninety-three in a crime-ridden inner-city neighborhood by being as tough and nasty as any criminal living nearby.

Her oddest actions involved her incorrect belief that she owned the road in front of her house. She didn't even own a car, but she insisted that nobody park there. She would confront them if they parked in front of her house. If they did it again, she slashed their tires in the middle of the night.

Over and over for years. She was never caught, but everybody knew it was her.

She only stopped when she lost the physical strength to slash a tire in her mid-eighties. Then she started using spray paint on the cars.

'He doesn't park in front of my house no more,' was all the justification she needed to damage her neighbors' cars."

2. "My friends used to live in a neighborhood near the beach in my city. They had a regular apartment, but someone bought the beach adjacent building in front of them, knocked it down, and put up a few luxury homes.

This crazy woman bought one. She had a two-car garage, a driveway, and best we could tell, she had one car. But no one was allowed to park on the street in front of her house, which was clearly marked as a public street. It was also where people had been parking since forever to go to the beach or because their building didn’t have parking. We could see this street from their apartment.

She went out and keyed any cars parked there. It took a while to figure out it was her, but eventually, people saw her doing it. All the neighbors warned their friends not to park there, and people started putting up cameras to get evidence of it. Some dude with a piece of junk truck started parking directly in front of her house every day just to mess with her because he didn’t care if she scratched it up. So she slashed his tires. It got to the point where every time she opened her door to walk outside, neighbors would cuss her out through their windows.

One night she went out in the middle of the night and painted the entire curb on that street red. Someone got it on video, several neighbors called the city. I think she got a talking to and a fine. She also had several insurance claims pending against her from damage to cars, and she finally stopped.

Everyone still hates her though, even new neighbors, who are told the story of her from older residents."

3. "She had a penchant for going around sticking nails in people's tires at night. That had happened dozens of times to nearly everyone on the street, though she slowed down since more people started installing video cams and motion-sensor lights in their driveways."

Virtual Reality Games
Virtual Reality Games

"My neighbor plays virtual reality games in a large bunny onesie. Like the kind, the kid gets in A Christmas Story. Which is fine, he should do what makes him fulfilled but he played with his window open so everyone could see him. On top of that, he played from what I could tell exclusively military sims and never broke character.

I could hear him yell stuff like, 'Contact thirty clicks south by southwest!'

Or stuff like, 'Down reloading, ready up!'

The guy would throw himself to the ground extremely hard. The few times I had spoken to him or seen him in person he had bruises on his arms and face from hitting the ground. And that was only what I could see from his window. Other than that at night, I could hear the guy grinding, hammering, and drilling on something.

He was a weird guy. He said he worked for the government and did contractor work. He had really nice stuff, expensive stuff, and new vehicles all the time.

He couldn't carry on a conversation. He started getting nervous and would break away as soon as he could.

At one point, he was home for a few weeks and said he was in between contracts.

I managed to talk to him a bit while he was setting stuff outside. He was laying out a rucksack that had seen some heavy use and everything from medical and survivalist camping gear to empty magazine holders and a plate holder for bullet-resistant plates.

He said he was letting them air out since he was planning on going on a backpacking trip for a few weeks.

The weirdest part was he left almost every night between nine and ten o'clock. It was probably to get some of the junk food he would leave in his car occasionally, but every night at the exact same time was weird.

I like to think the guy was a secret agent and used the virtual reality stuff as an excuse to explain away bruises and cuts. Either way, I felt safe because he was genuinely nice when he did talk to me. It just took him a while to warm up socially.

You go Secret Agent Bunny. Saving the world one hop at a time."

Neighborhood Gardening

Text Source 1, 2, 3, 4

Neighborhood Gardening

1. "She dug up my fancy flowers and replanted them in her own yard, fifteen feet away."

2. "I used to live in a little town of three hundred people where we had an elderly neighbor. She would routinely look near our garbage can outside and take the recyclable bottles and cans we would leave for her.

After we cleaned out a fish tank, we put the gravel and fake plants in a bag and left it on top of the garbage can because it was already full.

About a week later, the elderly neighbor hollered at me while I was outside to come over as she wanted to show me something.

She had taken that bag we had left and planted the fake plants along the side of her house. She said she wasn’t real confident that they would make it but so far they seemed to be thriving.

I could only nod and compliment her on her green thumb."

3. "He eats my flowers. In his defense, he told us that he had been doing it for years when he introduced himself after we bought the house. He also brought over frozen cookies in a plastic bag, as a housewarming gift, but we weren't sure what was in them.

We share a side yard and as he was talking to us, I noticed his all brick house, was actually roofing shingles, layered to look like brick. It started to register that he may be a little out there.

He's a great neighbor. Just an older, eccentric stoner who keeps to himself and eats my flowers. No shame. He would often come over to my yard, and eat my Lillie's raw, or bring scissors and clip the heads to boil and make jam.

It's crazy to me, but we have embraced it. I planted a couple of raspberry, blackberry, and blueberry bushes three years ago, when we first moved in, on the side yard we share. As well as a few knock-out rose bushes.

I told him to help himself to berries and roses anytime, especially before the birds do. The bushes have all gone insane and the entire side of my house is now a yearly buffet for my neighbor.

Having a decent relationship with a crazy guy I share a property line with, is worth some deadheaded flowers."

4. "We had a neighbor that we caught poisoning our trees, including the five fruit trees in our backyard that we eat from. We put cameras up and told him if we caught him doing it again, we would call the cops. He stopped even making eye contact with us after that.

He did manage to kill three of the fruit trees, which we planted back. The two that survived were the biggest lemon and tangerine trees I had ever seen in my life, and they produced monster-sized lemons and tangerines. The tangerines were bigger than the grapefruits.

I love it, like a magnificent, 'forget you,' to the neighbor.

He did it because he hates trees. He hates just seeing them."

Farm Land
Farm Land

"I grew up on a farm and we had a neighbor that believed he had a right to use our land whenever and however he wanted, on top of being an insufferable prick all the time.

He would threaten our family and our animals on a weekly basis. He constantly let his dog come on our property and chase our animals. He threw his trash into our pastures. He shot our horses with pellets. He played music twelve hours a day through loudspeakers to annoy us. He called the cops any time we had other neighbors over for a barbecue.

Which just typically resulted in the Sheriff's deputy enjoying some barbecue with us while we regaled them with stories about the awful neighbor who called them.

He lived on a tiny half-acre lot that was surrounded by our farmland. So just about every day he would hop on his ATV and ride it through the middle of our property as if he owned it."

Anti-Internet Neighbor
Anti-Internet Neighbor

"We had run-ins with this guy occasionally. Usually, he would accuse us of throwing joints into his wife’s headscarf from the balcony, which of course was hilarious and not true. He was clearly some kind of fundamentalist. He cut the internet to the house on two occasions.

This first time it happened we called the internet technician to come to fix it. I made sure I was home to let him in. The guy asked me where the apartment was with the cut wires and I walked him to the door on the first floor. I waited outside and within a minute the technician was coming back out. The man was standing there in the doorway giving me a death stare. He closed the door. I asked the technician what happened. He looked like he had seen a ghost.

He just said, 'I’ll explain everything to your roommate.'

My roommate was the leaseholder.

Apparently, the man went on some rant to the technician and refused to let him fix the wires. He had cut them on purpose. He also threatened to harm any man who came into his house while he wasn’t there.

Anyway, we decided to just go back when he wasn’t there and I had to walk the terrified technician into the apartment a second time where his wife let us in.

The technician said, 'Please don’t leave me alone.'

So I just stood in the open doorway. After having no internet for a week, it was finally fixed.

He never ended up confronting us about going into his apartment when he wasn’t there. That lasted about a year until he decided to do the same thing again.

That time I was even more furious. I said we need to involve the landlord and the police. I said I’m not going into that apartment again.

My third roommate decided to just go talk with the guy. I didn’t know about that and would have one hundred been against it. My roommate said the guy went on the same rants as before about sin and filth being in the cables. My roommate explained we needed the internet for work and school. He said this apparently changed the man’s mind and he allowed my roommate, who is quite handy, to fix the cable again.

My roommate then asked me to walk him into the apartment because he was also worried about getting attacked. I was, of course, very angry about the whole idea. I wanted to just have the police and management handle that. Then I was supposed to sit around the crazy guy’s apartment while my roommate messed with his walls. For what? So I can intimidate the man in his own home because otherwise, he might harm my roommate? Like, what are we doing? But it was already settled and I had to sit on the floor because there was no furniture in the man’s apartment.

My roommate worked for an hour or more and listened to this man rant about everything under the sun. I barely said a word. The craziest thing was that the man recommended YouTube conspiracy channels to us which he watched on his phone. The whole reason we were there was that the man thought the internet was evil.

Eventually, we finished and he asked us to sit and he talked at us even longer. It was so bizarre. I was super on edge. Eventually, he let us go and gave us some chocolate as a parting gift. Luckily I never had to talk to him again."