Engagement rings are a big deal. People can get very dramatic about the size of the diamond or the cut of the diamond or the setting. It can be all very complicated and usually, men are just along for the ride. Jewelers have a very unique seat for some of his insane drama and took to Reddit to give readers a front row seat.
These are stories about the craziest moments jewelers have ever seen regarding engagement rings. Golddiggers, drama queens, mean girls, and scammers all play their parts. It's a fascinating look into the drama-filled world of the lovers and (sometimes) haters. Content has been edited for clarity.
"I went with my buddy when he was going to pick a ring out for his soon-to-be fiancee. We walked in and the seller asked us, 'What is your price range?' That way, we didn't immediately go fall in love with a $10,000 ring when he was hoping to spend $1,000. I thought it was smart.
A couple came in behind us and they got the same question. The guy answered right away, 'No more than $3,000,' and the girl with him lost her absolute MIND.
'Is that ALL I'm worth to you?' she asked. 'Is that really all? A measly three thousand? My sister's ring was 15, how am I supposed to spend the holidays with a ring that's not even HALF that?'
The guy was pretty much acting like he could not hear her, so she turned her attention to the guy behind the counter.
'I'm just so embarrassed,' she said. 'We can afford more. I don't want you to think we're just some broke kids from off the curb. We have money, we have LOTS of money. I could buy everything in this store if I wanted! It's not like we don't have money! He makes more money in a week than you do in a year!'
Then, she turned on me (I'm a girl) and started asking, 'How much is HE spending on you? I bet it's more than three thousand! This is just so embarrassing! I can't believe you'd embarrass me in front of these people! We have money!'
Her boyfriend was literally asking questions about carats and diamond strength and whatever else goes on with rings while she was going on like a parrot in the background. The guy behind the counter did a pretty good job of tuning her out as well, I was surprised he kept his cool after she started insulting his salary. He just looked kind of dead in the eyes. I'm sure it wasn't the first clown he's had at his rodeo.
In the end, they did purchase a ring with the stipulation that he buy her an expensive necklace late. I think they put one on hold, or something."
"I kind of have a twist story.
A good friend works at a jewelry store and he once sold a guy a $12,000 engagement ring. The guy's fiancée yelled at him that she didn't want such an expensive, lavish ring because she didn't want him to spend that much money on her because it would make her look like a gold digger.
The guy ended up getting a $100 ring, which she was perfectly happy with."
"I worked at a luxury jewelry retailer. An old man came in saying he was going to propose to his girlfriend and that she had been hinting at a particular ring. I showed him the exact style. It was one of the stylized diamonds, so it's always cut in the same shape and size no matter what. It was $4,000. He didn't like the idea of it being that much, so he asked me to show him other rings. He settled on a ring that was around $2,500.
The next week, he came back, but I wasn't there. A co-worker had to help him and calm him down. He was fuming, apparently. He was so mad. He said I convinced him to get a different ring that his fiancée didn't want. He said I pressured him to get a different ring and totally ruined his engagement and he was now coming back to get the proper ring she asked for.
Yeah, OK, buddy. As a salesperson who works on commission, I really convinced you to get a cheaper ring.
Two weeks later, I helped the fiancée with her resizing and he wasn't with her. She knew by my name that I was the one who 'tricked' her fiancée to get the cheaper ring, but we didn't bring it up. I think she secretly knew her fiancée was in the wrong."
"I decided to propose to my girlfriend of three years on our three-year anniversary. I flew her to Vietnam and, after a couple of weeks traveling, we ended up in Cambodia. She had wanted to see Angkor Wat and some other temples that were on her bucket list. After a long day of hiking in the heat through ruins, we retired back to our hotel and when we were alone together, I proposed and she said yes.
We kissed and I had planned to take her to the waterfall the next day to celebrate. It’s really beautiful. She took a shower and I laid in bed thinking what an amazing day I just had and how I would get to spend the rest of my life with the women I loved. When she came out of the shower however, she was in tears. She handed me back the ring saying she couldn’t accept it because she didn’t want her memory of my proposal to be in a hotel room.
I played it cool and said I understood but, truthfully, it hurt. It seems to me that I had offered her something of value. A lifelong commitment and partner. I took her halfway around the world and helped her cross off something she had wanted to do most of her adult life. I felt that if she valued me it wouldn’t matter that the proposal wasn’t exactly what she wanted. It was me and our future together she was saying yes to and not my delivery. If she had found $1,000,000 in a dumpster, she wouldn’t throw it back because of where it came from. So, she can’t possibly value me or what I have to offer as an individual if she’s willing to reject it because she didn’t like the place I asked.
I’m preparing to end things when we get back. She wants me to propose again and better and then she’ll say yes, but I’m done. We can’t move forward in our relationship without someone giving at this point. I’ll discuss it with her and make it clear that I’m not redoing my proposal. I don’t think she’ll go for the idea of her having to propose. She’s a bit above that. I think she would see that as denigrating to have to ask me. She would see it as begging for a marriage. Still, I made my proposal and she returned it. It’s hard not to see that as a no to a lot of things."
"So about 10 years ago, I was in my early 30's still working for my dad at the jewelry shop he owned. His health was declining so I had pretty much taken over the duties of running the shop. A young couple came in that looked about 20 and they told me that they wanted to get married and wanted to look at engagement rings.
I went through the normal line of questions (what kind of style, what's your price range, etc.) and through all of it, I could see that the boy was just so happy that he didn't care. The girl was so extremely picky and rude and the boy just wanted to make her happy. She ended up picking out a set that was worth about $8,000. I could see in the boy's eyes that he probably didn't have the money to pay for it, but he agreed that he would come back. He came back, alone about a week and a half later with $8,000 in CASH. I'm not one to turn away money, but I couldn't help but ask him where he got it. He said that he sold his car that his father had bought him for graduating from college to pay for the ring. I told him that it was a big thing for him to do, but he was an adult so I didn't try to talk him out of it.
Anyway, about four months went by and the girl came strolling back into the shop, except this time she was with a DIFFERENT GUY! It was the same exact story of both of them wanting to get married and they were there to pick out a ring. I was in completely disbelief that this girl was with somebody else and was pulling the same strings that she did for the other guy! It made me SO angry because I remembered the other guy that had sold his car to make her happy. I bit my tongue for the most part but, throughout, made little snide comments here and there like, 'Hey, you look familiar. Have you ever been here before?' She denied all of it, of course.
She picked out another ring. The whole set was worth about $4,500. The guy agreed that he would come back and I was in complete disbelief of the deja vu that I'm experiencing. But then it gets worse
The girl asked me if I bought used rings. My blood instantly started to boil, but I kept my composure and told her that I did. She then pulls out (you guessed it) the ring that I originally sold to her ex that she conned. She said that it was her grandmother's ring who recently passed away and I just SNAPPED.
I said, 'Huh, that's weird. You said your grandma owned this ring? Because it looks exactly like the ring that I sold to your ex-fiancé a few months ago!'
She turned beet red and got absolutely furious with me, cussing me out, saying that I was a liar, etc. Then, she looked at her current boy toy and said, 'Well? Do something!' He looked at her and looked back at me hesitantly and, apparently, her spell of seduction was strong enough that he decided that lunging at me was a good idea.
He caught me with my hands down at first and knocked me back into a cabinet, which shattered. While I was down, I managed to trip my silent alarm. He then came at me again and I managed to get a couple of shots in. We were going toe to toe for a good 30 seconds when, suddenly, I felt a warm sensation on the left side of my back (around where the kidneys are). I was in shock and it was like in the movies where I touched the area and brought my hand back up, covered in blood, in complete disbelief. The other guy was in disbelief, too, and stopped attacking me. I turned to my side and there stood the girl with a FREAKING knife in her hand. The broad stabbed me!
When the reality of what happened set in, I got extremely dizzy from all of the blood loss and fell to the ground. They ran outside only to be apprehended by police. I was taken to the hospital and later found out that she had lacerated my kidney and I was a lot closer to death than I originally thought."
"I went to a jeweler with my boyfriend of over three years to look at engagement rings. We both talked about going and had set a time to go and were both pretty excited about it. He had a meeting right afterward, so we drove there in separate cars but went in together. My mother gave me her ring from her and my dad’s marriage. They’re now divorced (I know, bad omen to use a ring from a failed marriage, but I’m only using the center diamond - it’s one carat and excellent clarity).
Anyway, as soon as we got inside, it was like a switch flipped. When I greeted the jeweler, he walked to the other side of the store and did not come back over to where I was asking questions of the jeweler until I asked him if he wanted to come see the rings she’d brought out. He then came over and stood there silently while I continued to ask about the details of my mom’s diamond and looked at bands that would look good with it.
Now, a little background info: he’s known for having a resting face that looks like either he just saw every dog he’s ever known die in front of him or someone just gravely insulted him and every member of his family in succession. Serious resting face in the extreme. Everyone ribs him for it and he has a good sense of humor about it. I usually ignore it, but I could tell this wasn’t just resting face. Something was off.
So, he was not saying a single word and I was asking questions intermittently so we did not both stand there in silence staring at the jeweler and rings like serial killers, and in an attempt to get him to say something, I asked him what he thought about one of the rings. He shrugged and mumbled, 'It’s nice.' The jewelers laughed at his obviously morose and less than enthusiastic response, and he got mildly defensive saying, 'I mean, it’s a diamond ring. It’s nice.'
At that point, I was blushing and beyond embarrassed. I looked like this totally psycho girlfriend who dragged her begrudging boyfriend into a jeweler to force him into an engagement. So, I politely wrapped up the conversation the best I could without crying and walked out with my mom’s ring in my purse. I told him outside while crying I’d never been more humiliated in my life thus far and that it was a huge mistake going there with him. He felt remorse at first and asked me what was wrong and I responded, 'If you honestly don’t know what you did wrong right there, then I know all I need to know.'
I said that as I was backing out of the parking space, and he then became angry at my saying that and tried to get out of the car WHILE it was moving. I stopped and he got out and, right before I drove away he stood outside my car, shrugged his shoulders, and said, 'I don’t know,' at which point I drove away.
We live together, have for one year, and I am 26 he is 28. I love him dearly and could definitely spend my life with him, but he can be quite the quirky dude and this bout of quirk really threw me for a loop. I don’t know what the heck happened, but it was really weird and left me feeling SO uneasy about getting engaged at all.
We had a chance to talk it all out. We were both pressed for time when going to the jeweler and totally underestimated the weight of the situation, and it combusted in front of us and we both panicked. We agreed we would try again on his time when we both have plenty of time to enjoy the process. Also, we talked about the all-importance of communication and how we need to do better at that, of course."
"I've been in this business for over 10 years and I've sold enough engagement rings that I really have no idea how many are out there at this point. Sooner or later, this is bound to happen. I've had it happen a few times. Here's the worst story:
A couple came in together (let's call them 'Mike' and 'Stephanie'). Mike was ready to spend about $20,000, which is a LOT of money for a young couple, and I was showing them rings in that range, but Stephanie kept pushing for more, and more, and MORE. Finally, with enough begging, pleading, smiles, and thinly veiled physical promises, she talked him into a 3-carat center diamond, with an elaborate setting, for around $30,000. Honestly, I did not feel great about having to witness this whole exchange, but at the end of the day, it was none of my business, so I completed the transaction.
About three weeks later, Stephanie came to my office alone. I assumed she needed the ring re-sized or something, but instead, she asked me if I could remove the center diamond and replace it with a CZ (cubic zirconia, a very cheap diamond substitute). I was surprised, so I stammered, 'Sure, but why? Are you traveling or something and don't want to risk the stone?' She responded that it was nothing like that. She just preferred to have the CZ in there for now.
Obviously, every red flag in existence was waving in front of my eyes at that point, so I said, 'OK,' took her ring, and told her she could come back in a day or two to pick it up with the CZ in it. But as soon as she was out the door, I dialed Mike. After all, HE'S the one who wrote me a $30,000 check, so HE WAS my customer, not HER. Mike picked up and, after a moment of small talk, I asked him if he knew what Stephanie was up to. 'NO!' was the shocked response.
Mike called me back the next day and told me that ,apparently, Stephanie was planning to call off the engagement and return the ring, but keep the 3-carat diamond. He was obviously very upset and asked me if I could give him a refund. I offered my sympathy and gave him back his money. Needless to say, he was very grateful that I had called him.
About two years later, Mike came back with another woman who I liked much better. They're happily married with two kids now. Mike and I have become friends and he's probably referred me 10-plus other customers over the years. As for Stephanie, after she left my office that day, I never saw her again."
"My ex-fiancé and I got engaged July of last year. It was such an amazing night, he surprised me by taking me to the exact spot we met and got on one knee. It was straight out of a romance movie. I have never been happier in my life. That happiness extended through out most of our engagement until January.
That’s when he said the words that everyone dreads hearing: 'we need to talk.' He said that he had actually been second guessing himself throughout our entire engagement and he thinks that we are making a mistake. I was floored. I had no idea he had been feeling this way while I was in soon-to-be wed bliss.
I tried to talk to him about wedding jitters and how it’s normal to feel this way before a big commitment. I told him that we were in love and there’s no mistake in that. His mind was set though. I’m not sure who he’s been talking to about this, but I really doubt he came to this conclusion on his own. I hoped that if I gave him some time and space that he would come around and see the real mistake he was making. So, I moved back to my parent’s.
I’ve tried to keep in touch at least through texts and online. Sometimes he responded in short bursts, sometimes he would not respond at all. I’ve given up hope at this point. Then out of nowhere last weekend he reached out to me. We talked a little and it was like part of me came back to life again. I was so happy again, but only for minutes this time. The real reason he was reaching out was because he wanted my engagement ring back. It was like soaring up into the air only to slam back down to the ground.
I stopped responding to him. I honestly can’t believe he would even ask. It’s like what we had meant nothing at all to him and now all he cares about is cashing out. This is my ring. He gave it to me and it obviously means a lot more sentimentally to me than to him. It represents our relationship and even if it had a painful end, I don’t want to part with it."
"I have a friend named Joanne, who is a bit socially awkward, which is not that uncommon for lesbians. She decided that she wanted to put a timer on herself to motivate her to get out there and meet women. She went to a jewelry store, picked out a big, gorgeous ring, priced it out exactly as she would want, and then got a number: $20,000.
So, then, Joanne went home and worked out a plan. She was going to put $250 a month in the bank for the next seven years. During that time, her goal was to meet a woman worthy of this ring. She was motivated. This was about 10% of her take-home pay, so it was a significant amount to her. She started dating, asking girls out, had a few relationships.
Finally, she met Dawn. Dawn is nothing at all like Joanne. Where Joanne is a bit socially awkward and kind of quiet, Dawn is tall, loud, and boisterous. She laughs too loud and too often for some people. She's always got a story, she can drink like a sailor, and Joanne is completely in love with her. They met, dated a few times, and in three weeks, Dawn moved into Joanne's apartment. Some of Joanne's friends did not like Dawn. Her roommate did not mind so much.
Dawn lost her job and, for three months, looked for another one while she finished grad school. Dawn may have been a bit obnoxious, but she was seemingly pretty honest. She seemed to really care for Joanne.
A couple more years went by and Joanne told me she had saved up the amount. She had a savings account with $20,000 in it and she wanted to ask Dawn to marry her. Dawn had been employed for a few years as a graphic designer and part time community college professor for art history. I told Joanne she should ask Dawn first, but she was having none of it. Joanne went to the store, bought a ring almost identical to the one she wanted, and she took it home to propose to Dawn.
Dawn lost it. She just started crying. She couldn't handle it. She said she would not give her an answer. She needed time to think. She needed to be alone. Dawn headed out the door - no luggage, no keys. Dawn was just... gone.
Six hours later, Joanne called me in hysterics. She wanted to take the ring back, but didn't trust herself to drive. Could I take her? Sure. So, if you've never been to a jewelry store to return a ring with a sobbing woman, good for you. It's basically the best way to get people to give you the dirtiest looks possible. So, Joanne and I got the money and we were heading home. We got to the house and there was Dawn on the porch. I told her I was going to leave, but Joanne told me to stay, 'Just in case.'
Turns out Dawn had been proposed to once before - by a guy, her first boyfriend right out of high school. Dawn is a bit of a drama queen and didn't even consider ever being married again since gay marriage wasn't legal in our state at the time. She just figured she'd be one of those 'old lesbians' you see on the weekend buying plants. She walked around for almost eight hours, considering it. She told us both that she had to be completely honest, first and foremost. She then told us the following:
She would absolutely marry Joanne, but there would be no $20,000 ring. There would be no diamond because Dawn hates the diamond industry. Dawn wanted a simple titanium band, 'like a dude. Diamonds would just get in the way.'
Despite her previous kind of weird bohemian existence, she admitted that she's from a very wealthy, very large family that loves her very much and does not care that she's gay. Joanne had met her mom once and a brother once, but somehow had missed the fact that Dawn had six total siblings and step-siblings and had a personal trust fund that was well into the seven-figure range. 'We just never talked about that stuff much as long as the bills got paid,' she said.
Dawn said that they shouldn't get married right away in San Francisco, where they lived, but that they should spend a month traveling first - 'If we can still stand each other after traveling for a month, we're good.' Joanne had always wanted to travel but didn't have the money. That had changed.
When Dawn and Joanne came back from their month abroad, they were very much in love and wanted to get married immediately. A matching pair of titanium rings, $50 each off Amazon. 'Like a dude,' as Dawn said. They got married (a ceremony, at least) in Golden Gate Park. I was there with some close friends. It was lovely."
"I was witness to a pretty funny event when I was buying an engagement ring.
This guy was there with his friend to shop for an engagement ring (was nervous and needed support?). I guess he started having a panic attack and freaking out about the commitment of getting engaged. He was hyperventilating, sweating, looking pretty bad. The saleswoman had him sit down on a couch. She vanished for a minute and then came back with a cold one and a warm cookie.
The dude shoveled the cookie down his throat, drank about half the brew immediately, and started calming down.
How much of an all-star was this saleswoman that she had a brew and warm cookies ready? I asked the saleswoman I was talking to (a different one) and she said it happens all the time and they always have cold ones and cookies ready during business hours."
"We had less than a hundred dollars between us when we decided to get married, but desperately wanted rings so we bought silicone bands and I waited months for him to propose. We were happy. I had a ring I could wear 24/7 even though I'm a chef and he could get used to wearing a ring and having something important.
It's now a year later and I hate my ring. I hate how it smooshes when I grab anything. I hate how it's so light I have to look to make sure I'm wearing it. I hate that I take it off to twist it like a fidget tool. I hate when it gets caught on something and I can feel it slide and bend.
I just want to be his husband, I want a real gold ring, and be seen as a real couple. Having a silicone band makes me feel like I'm playing house. Almost all of my culinary school classmates are older than 40 and also have silicone rings, but I still feel bad about having one."
"There's a group of ladies out there who thought I was serious when I did this.
A local jewelry store was closing down and they were holding liquidation sale, so my boyfriend and I popped in to check it out. He headed immediately to the watches, and I browsed the rings. He finished first, came over to see what I was looking at, and did a Homer Simpson and slowly backed away.
I 'threw a fit.' I don't even remember what all I said. Something like, 'Oh you can look at $700 watches but you can't even glance at a ring for me?! If you don't want to marry me, just say so!' and I stormed out of the store.
He followed, concerned, only to find me laughing my tail off. Thankfully, we have the same sense of humor so he found it funny, too, but he still hasn't put a ring on it."